On The Greatness of Being a Man

There are a lot of great things about being a man. A lot. And if I talked about all of them, this would go on for pages. So I'm just going to pick a few. But before I do, a short list of the things that didn't make the cut:

1. Being under no social obligation to shave. Why is shaving so annoying? Who knows. It just really is.

2. Being able to walk outside in the dark, by yourself. Every time a girl says something about not being out at night alone I think "gosh that's got to be terrible."

3. Having an innate working knowledge of physics. Sure, I can fix your toilet, because by looking at it I can figure out how it works.

4. Being attracted to Felicia Day. And women in general.

Before I begin though, I want to put in a little disclaimer. As Jessica pointed out, we can only write from our own perspectives. The things we share are simply things we've noticed that seem to be common experiences. But I don't think a group's experiences will ever be fully common. My experiences, thoughts, and feelings will always be my own -- having passed through the unique filter of my senses. So please keep that in mind, and when you see something different, let me know. I'm always looking for a more accurate idea of what the common experience might be. In addition, I'm going to talk about some of the better traits of men, which is not to claim them for men alone, but to show that men exemplify them. Many women also have these amazing qualities, and that's a great thing.

Here we go.

I've been reading through the book of Genesis in the last couple days. Now, whether you take this story to be literal truth, metaphorical truth, or just a story, I think it says some interesting things. For example, in the garden of Eden, God gives Adam some very clear directives. He asks him to name the animals. He asks him to cultivate the garden. He asks him to increase and multiply. As I read this, I see that a role of men is to Do Big Things. And it's not just a role, it's a gift, maybe even a privilege. There is something about us that makes us horribly unsatisfied with doing little things like the dishes or mowing the lawn. We'd much rather sail a boat to Antarctica or make a living stealing from the rich to give to the poor. This is really clear when you watch little boys play outside. If you give a little boy a big stick he's much more likely to pretend he's got a spear to fight off bad guys than he is to pretend it's a shepherd's crook for watching sheep. This stays with us as we get older too. When I worked at Costco my job consisted of stacking products on top of each other, or moving pallets of product around. While that's an easy way to get paid, it's so pointless to do day after day. You arrive the next day to see that people have bought three vacuums. So you add three more to the pile. I don't want to do little things. It makes me feel useless. I want to Do Big Things.

Shackleton decided to go to the south pole. In a wooden boat. That's a Big Thing. 

Then they all came back alive. Without their boat. That's a Bigger Thing.

Because we men like to Do Big Things, we are also very task oriented. We get things done, and most times that's really helpful. Every woman probably knows what it's like to have a man trying to fix their emotional problems. It's terrible, but I promise that urge does have a good use. If you can convince me to get behind something, I will burn through problems with hurricane force. The force of men who believe in something is not a thing you want to stand in the way of. It's men like this who win wars, eradicate diseases, and stand against oppression. I think every man has a little bit of MacGuyver in him.

I love the adventurous spirit of men. It was men who climbed aboard ships going west in hopes of getting to the East Indies. It was men who crossed the rocky mountains to explore the west. It was men who drove thousands of cattle through Colorado, living on biscuits and coffee. It was men who thought it would be a good idea to go to the moon, and did it. Deep down, we still know we'd give up comfort for the wild unknown.

I love the strength of men. We have been endowed with muscles that lift and strain and we've been given minds that tend toward conviction. We carry with us the knowledge that were disaster ever to strike, we would be on the scene tearing away the rubble, lifting beams and cutting through rebar because we have the strength for it. We know that were an injustice ever done to those we love, we would be there to stand and fight against it, and if we couldn't fight, to simply stand in the way.

I love the fierce, sacrificial love of men. What drives us to go back across no man's land to rescue a fallen comrade? Or to run into a burning building to save a stranger? What prompts Sidney Carton to take another man's place on the tumbril? Or Horatius to stand fast against an army while his countrymen destroy the bridge behind him? It's something very mysterious, and I don't think anyone really knows why we are this way, but it is very much a part of who we are.

It would be ignorant to not take a moment to look at reality, though. To be truthful, we men are pretty messed up. It is sadly uncommon to see a man who is Doing Big Things; a man who is adventurous, strong, and sacrificial. No one ever said it would be easy to be a man, but I see these qualities inside of myself and others. If the qualities are there, then the potential is there. Let's do what we can to work toward that potential.